As I packed up and out, I then had to unpack. I am still unpacking. Not sure what to do with all the pictures of "us", how to meld them into the new but still I am the same. Just one less. I rummaged through the papers, files of things forgotten. Found the first of many "sorry's" I used to believe. The emotion is real, it is raw. It is what kept me in the cycle of a toxic marriage for 18 years. This first one though is the most genuine one of them all. It breaks my heart all over again to read it. I wish he could have done what he said. I wish he could have stopped doing what he does. I wish I could have been the one who helped him change it all. It reminds me of the freedom I now have, the hurt and pain I used to live in. Blaming myself for not being good enough. Here I share it with you...
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